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goodgirlgonebadnew

I’ve always wondered what this meant. I mean in my mind good girls are the ones that well… do good. Bad girls, are the ones who don’t. One is a pillar in society, the other is in jail. However, like anything else things aren’t always what they seem. According to a random poll that I took with complete and total biases, no proper sample, and no kind of professionalism, I came to the conclusion that there are hardly any good girls left in the world. Here is what my research turned up for me.

Good Girls:

  • Virgins
  • Naive
  • Somewhat Nerdy
  • Very Sweet & Kind
  • Tend to be under-developed (What!)
  • Wears clothes that fit her
  • Eat healthy (again… What!?)

Bad Girls:

  • Not virgins
  • Have tattoos/piercings
  • Are very sweet & kind as well
  • Despite the above statement they are fond of trickery and using their feminine wiles
  • Probably smokes cigarettes
  • Over-developed
  • Shops at Wet Seal, Rave, and Man Alive
  • Also shops at only high-end stores because she’s got some simp paying for it
  • Dances provocatively
  • Smart, but also not smart.
  • This list seriously goes on and on

So pardon me for thinking WTHeck. How do you figure? These are seriously some responses I received in my random polling of people who clearly should not be allowed to speak in public. Judging by this criteria I am a pretty much just a girl. Not good or bad. It got worse but I thought I would spare the readers. Why is it that Good Girls have to be nuns and Bad Girls equal the devil. What does this differentiation even necessary? A good girl is under-developed!? Please tell me how she is able to really help that. If she has a child (which if she’s not married, automatically makes her a Bad Girl) and grows a body all of a sudden, is she then a Bad Girl? I’m so confused. Please help me people. All jokes aside, when Rihianna was the “Good Girl Gone Bad” what exactly did that mean? Was it like “Genie In a Bottle” Christina Aguilera to “Dirty” Christina? And even in that case, Christina became a “Bad Girl” when out of her little group of Pop Starlets she seems to be the one faring the best and doing things right in life. Interesting.

What are you definitions of a Good Girl vs a Bad Girl. Can you tell me the point of even defining this? Are you a good girl or are you a bad girl? Menfolk, which do you prefer?

J “adjusting my halo” G*

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I was sitting in my cubbie when a fellow co-worker walked past and my senses were flooded with some cheap cologne that he clearly found it necessary to douse himself with. he had to have been about 3 feet away yet I was still able to feel as though I had been thrown face first into a toilet bowl filled with old spice or whatever the mountain version of this shit is.

as I experienced this, I threatened fellow twitterlings that I would post a blog on the proper usage of smell goods for both men and women… well ladies and gentlemen, here it is…

deodorant cant cover already existing odors

deodorant can't cover pre-existing odors

the guide to proper scent usage

here are a couple things that will help you on your way to finding balance between funk and ‘mmm, you smell delicious’:

1. stuff that sprays does not replace stuff that suds

this is number one for a reason. I remember working in bath and body works and girls coming in who clearly had replaced a shower with a douse of cucumber melon… huge no no. bathing is a must and what’s really hood in whatever year we are in. jumping in the shower hitting the ‘hot spots’ with some soap, water, and wash cloth is a necessary, daily thing. you should embrace this time be it morning, noon, or night.

2. sex is not the only thing that requires lubrication

your skin needs it too. again, this is for men and women alike. fellas, they have unscented or neutral smelling lotions that will soften skin and moisturize all at the same time. ladies, we know that lotion is geared toward is so don’t be afraid to embrace it. don’t run from it and don’t forget to put some on your booty as dudes are now tryna use our booties as pillows. y is lubrication important? because the more supple the skin, the better the scent will absorb and last.

3. layering is not only for cold days

this is an important concept that I learned while working and bath and body works. your scent starts with the soap and you build from there. not only does this help with the scent having some dimension, it ensures that you don’t overdo it with the body splash or cologne. gents, axe and other man brands have made this a possibility for you so you aren’t left out here. starting with a nicely scented soap and following it with a nicely scented lotion empowers your fragrance while not making it overpowering and offensive to those around you. plus, this way the scent lasts longer so at the end of the day when ur boo inhales your essence, they are met with the lingering sensation of the starting scent.

and if none of this makes sense to you, apply the disclaimer ur moms used to tell you while u were washing dishes/clothes: more isn’t always better. if u still don’t smell quite fresh, please see number one and wash your stankin booty!!!

my good people, thoughts? encounters with the people who’d rather cover their funk then wash it away? people in ur lives u feel need to read this? talk to me!!!!

xoxo
“I layer lovely” ladebelle

— Post From My iPhone

xoxo
ladebelle

Age Aint Nothin But A Number right?

cougar

Often times we see age differences in dating couples, maybe a year or two, but when we see major gaps it is most notably between an older man and a younger woman. There have been famous cases for this i.e. Anna Nicole Smith and that old guy, the Playboy bunnies and Hef, and so on and so forth. But alas….. just like 30 is the new 20, older women have become the hunters.

My favorite cougar is Eva Longoria’s Character on Desperate Housewives. She’s hot and he’s hotter.

jessepicture1

Next up would be Usher and Baby Factory Tameka

usher_cougar

I have to admit that I can foresee this in my future. If for some strange reason I’m not married by the time I’m 30, and my 30+ situation doesn’t work out, then I’m going full Cougar. I’ve never dated a younger man, but even JG* has weaknesses, and recently a young one has tapped into those. He and I don’t fit into the “Half Plus Seven Rule” (see below) but I’m 3 years removed from college, and he’s still enjoying the ride. I can’t help it though. He’s so cute and untarnished. Life is still so sweet to him, and no one has broken his heart. Even though the gap is not that big, he still looks at me like “the older woman” and something about that is kinda hot. I just want to spoil him. He wants me to fly down and visit him, I just want to send him a ticket to come see me. Crazy right!? This is not the JG* we all know and love.

halfplusseven

So ladies, ever been in Cougar mode? Men: ever been cougar bait? Why is it so much more social acceptable for older men to date younger women? According to somebody’s random census data that I’m not directly quoting, but women are more likely to outlive their male partners by seven years. So, it only makes sense that I should be looking for a man at least 7 years younger than me so that we can grow old and die together.

What say the people?

J “Cougarlicious” G*

both JG* and i have some of the meanest shoe collections and are both lovers of the color red so naturally we had to participate in this project. outside of the obvious reasons of vanity, the project is aimed at increasing awareness in AIDS and HIV to young (and older) women. 

wanna a know a little more about it? check out http://theredpumpproject.blogspot.com/ for greater details into the cause.

wanna join the cause? holla at the ladies over there and let them know you’re tryna rock the red pump too!

 

rockin the red pump baby!!!

rockin the red pump baby!!!

common sense… it’s something that is supposed to be common right? i mean, that’s why it’s called common sense and not uncommon sense. that’s what i thought but lately i’ve been thinking that more people (and animals) were running wild while God was giving out things like common sense, thinking, and other “gifts” along those lines…

 

soooo tru!!!

soooo tru!!!

 

 

now for all of you who have common sense who have to put up with people that lack in common sense probably deal with frusterations daily, as i’ve found out that more then half the population is lacking in sense that is supposed to be common.

so this is my theory… there are essentially three categories pertaining to common sense… these three are those who have and use it, those who have it and don’t use it, and those who just don’t have it…

…those who just don’t have it…

these are the people who REALLY frusterate and piss off the people who have it and use and just confuse the people who have it and don’t use it… as frusterating as it is that they just don’t have any sense, you can’t really be too mad at them… common sense, after all, is something that we’re supposedly born with so we can’t be mad at them BUT we can be mad at their damn parents…

…those who have it and don’t use it…

these people are often mistaken for the people that just don’t have it but they use their sense sometimes, though inconsistently. these are the people that drive the people who have it and use ABSOLUTELY crazy!!! it’s a constant enigma to the people who have it and use it why these people just don’t use it all the time! and frusteration here is warranted because these people could easily use the sense they know they have but they just don’t… know whether it’s intentional or unintentional that they don’t use their sense is still being debated… nonetheless, their parents should have put a foot in their asses when they weren’t using their sense so that as adults the rest of the world didn’t have to deal with it.

…the people who have it and use it…

i think that these are the most confused and frusterated of the three… they have the sense and are actively using it and enjoying using it. what they do makes sense and is purposeful… they can be planners or whimsical… either way, they make SENSE… they don’t understand how people are born without sense and how people just decide not to use sense… either way, they must learn to come to peace with the other two groups or they will end up frusterated for eternity…

eh, these are just my theories but what do you guys think?

 

xoxo

“i have common sense” ladebelle

yes, i know that funnest is not technically a word but for today, it is! you guys already know the drill so let’s rock!

ladebelle’s fun facts for the week:

  • i’m still sick… go figure
  • this is like day 10 of me being a raw foodie and the thought of anything cooked makes my mouth water
  • last nite i had my first tweet up with HollyGoLightly and we had a BLIZAST!!!
  • this morning i’m still feeling the effects of last nite and have a mean “lean” as someone put it
  • coughing is horribly annoying while sneezing makes me feel wonderful
  • sexting is a serious epidemic… people need to relax some more
  • the last person i talked to on the phone made me smile and i liked that
  • yesterday’s post and the comments about it brought great laughter to me… special shout out to jared who surprisingly read the blog and posted a nice comment to it…
  • i guess i’m now accepting questions from readers… shoot me an email to ladebelle@gmail.com if you’d like to submit a question, scenario, topic, etc.

JG* in the House!

  • Yes yes y’all and it don’t stop. I’m in Chicago. I love this city. They are going to have to remove me in a box. Nah…i’mma leave when my flight is scheduled. LOL
  • I’ve been working on my Northern slang. So now I say “Son” or “yea* son” like all the time. Son
  • I haven’t worked out since Tuesday and I’m feeling pretty bad about it.
  • Everybody on twitter tweeting Michael Jackson stuff got me all hype this morning. Come on y’all. And Diddy. Popeyes is better. Case closed.
  • I’m claiming that this year is “Do Better ’09” because I have seen some real coonery out there and it needs to stop.
  • I’m in hardcore booski hunt. I mean I’m not hunting. But I’m putting the bait out there. Spring is in the air and I’m feeling all lovey.
  • Hey! Add me on facebook!
  • I’m driving to Florida as soon as my flight lands tonight. I swear. I be movin.
  • I gotta find a way to keep parts of this southern girl inside of me when I make it big. I love that I say things like “I be movin”.

as most of you know, JG* is out in chi-town running the streets making the world a better place so we shall see if she posts her facts (i hope she does cuz i haven’t had a chance to catch up with her this week).

alrighty, it’s you guys’ turn!

ok… so here’s the scenario…

candace and jared are friends. they’ve been friends for a while and have helped each other get through some times together. they started having sex but luckily this didn’t change the dynamics of their friendship-they were friends who would occasionally bump uglies. candace will on occasion help jared at his store because he’s been going through some hard times. one nite, after the store closes and they all go out for drinks, jared invites a stripper friend along with them. candace, jared, joanne (the stripper friend) and some of the store staff are all kickin it at the bar when jared calls candace over to talk with him and joanne. jared says “i would like to introduce you two and two people i’m having sex with. i think you guys should get to know each other.” 

we’ll take a pause here because dear readers, i want to know what you would do in this scenario. ladies, would you pop off and go crazy? brush it off and have your poker face on? or not think anything of it? fellas, what would you expect the candace to do? what type of reaction would be too crazy, if any? would you do this to two girls you were sleeping with?

talk to me!!!! 

 

xoxo

“doesn’t hate on strippers… it’s a recession and i put be pullin my g-string out for tips soon too” ladebelle

Real talk. When I first saw this I sat there with my jaw on the ground. But it’s pure genius! I know most of you all have seen this, and honeslty you may feel like I’m preaching to the choir, but you never know. And clearly you do *read* since you are reading this blog. However, I am of the mindset that we have a charge to help those around us to do better. Far too many people walk around seeing through others and never reach out a hand to help.

So with all that being said, I watched this video and thought even to myself: What was the last great book you’ve read. I finally realized that it was Assata by Assata Shakur and it was a hard hitting book that really changed my focus on things. I love to read, and a good book is almost as stimulating as a great intellectual conversation between good friends. Sometimes even moreso because it can’t talk back and say some dumb ish. LOL But I read that book over a year ago. While I am an avid reader of blogs, and I feel like reading the political circuit is surely a great idea for someone wanting to get great insights to all sides of the political spectrum, I also feel like it dumbs down the process a bit. If you lurk on blogs you are simply feeding off of everyone else’s dissection of a topic. When you pick up a book or any other type of publication or literature it is up to you to form you own opinions and have that open dialouge and discourse with yourself. I think that is an important process for our own personal developement and ability to discover and research new things. I am a wiki and google freak. Any time I dig up something new that I don’t understand or I question it’s validity, I hit up google and dig and dig until I feel I’ve found somewhat satisfactory answers.

Are we teaching this to our kids today? Are we showing our kids that reading is more than just fundamental, it’s awesome and great too? I know grown people who can’t get through an 100 page book, and I feel like they are missing out on a wealth of good stuff. The classics. Alas Babylon, 1984, Revolutionary Suicide (Huey P. Newton’s Autobiography. Amazing) and a whole list of others. So let me share with you what I’m reading right now, and can you all do the same? Kind of a “Ranter’s Book Club” if you will.

  • Catch 22 by Joseph Heller (somehow I missed this one on the middle school reading list)
  • Siddhartha by Hermann Hesse
  • And I *might* just *might* pick up Steve Harvey’s new book Act Like A Lady, Think Like A Man

What y’all Ranters out there reading?

JG*

sooooo, within the past couple weeks, i’ve been pretty angry about some things so instead of turning those into multiple blogs where i complain, today’s blog is solely dedicated to ranting about things that not only i, but you guys too, are angry/mad/pissed/confused about. pretty much anything but sad… the mad rapper did it and today, i’m the angry blogger…

 

mad rapper meet angry blogger... whats poppin

mad rapper meet angry blogger... what's poppin

 

 

without further adieu, i give you my rants:

  • sometimes i just hate people period. i mean, most people are these selfish individuals that are only focused on what pleases them and more importantly, what you can do for them. no one ever stops and thinks, “oh, well what can i do for this person?” and if you are that person who stops and thinks that, then you feel overwhelmed and underappreciated because you’ll forever be the person that people run over and take advantage of. 
  • i hate it when you’re supposed to depend on people then when you need them they aren’t there and then they have the nerve to tell you that you don’t open up to them. what?!?!? 
  • i hate this recession… during these times your supervisor/manager/whatever the fuck you want to call them think that they can just hold your jobs over your heads. i was talking to a friend last nite who this just happened to and she’s a teacher… hell, we need good teachers! what is REALLY going on?!?!? are job threats what’s really hood in 09?
  • i hate that the dryer eats my socks. no really, it does. i swear i will put a pair in that bitch and all it spits out is one. that is nerve wracking… i mean, whenever i’m looking for my gym socks or trouser socks i can’t ever find the other one!!
  • or how about when ur looking for something and you can’t find it but then when you aren’t looking for it, that shit is just all up in your face? bananas… it’s a conspiracy.
  • i hate it when you want something that you can’t have. i mean, why can’t we just control our wants to wanting something that we can have instead of wasting all this time and emotion on something that’s not even within your reach
  • i love that i’m not the same person that i was last year but i hate that people just want to see who i used to be. what in the hell is the point in changing if the outside world doesn’t acknowledge the shit?!?! i might as well stay the immature bitch that i was before! granted, i love who i am even more now! 
  • i hate moodiness… or people who want you to be around their moodiness. like, if you’re wishy washy, don’t holla at me until you’re certain about something. until then, beat it. 
  • i hate that just because people think you’re strong that means that you don’t need attention. i mean, everyone needs some kind of attention. yeah, i’m gonna make it without you but it would be nice to have some fuckin help if you’re supposed to be “in my corner”

ok… so i can apparently keep going at this for awhile but i’m more interested in your rants now… so tell ladebelle why you made son!!!!

 

xoxo

“the angry blogger” ladebelle

We haven’t forgotten the atrocities that took place in Gaza this year. And we’re still watching. We understand that both sides are under intense pressure and nervousness, but we will not tolerate war crimes.

We haven’t forgotten what happened to Oscar Grant and to be honest, I’m still waiting to hear what’s going on. This reminds me I need to send a letter to ask for updates.We will never forget the many many many people of color that have fallen to the brutality of the police force.

We haven’t forgotten the ugly words that were flung during the election cycle. The resurgence of the word “Nigger” (now replaced by President. See here), the way people spat Muslim through gritted teeth, the nasty looks, and the horrible cartoons, cookies, and jokes that were told.

And we WILL NOT FORGET the next example of police brutality even though they are trying so hard to excuse it.

I will not listen to someone who rants and raves about how the office in this video was physically assaulted and had reason to release this disgusting beating from hell upon this young 15 year old girl. She flung A SHOE at him and while that is rude and disrespectful I will not excuse his actions. The way he handled that girl, she will be hardened for life. It’s only natural that she learns to brace herself and be on the offense against this kind of treatment. The fact that it comes from an officer means that the Law will always be her enemy. This is not rehabilitation people. This is slavery recycled. Beat them, and put them in cages, beat them again, and keep them in the system.

I watched the State of the Black Union this weekend and I really enjoyed it. It was powerful, thought provoking, full of hot air, and loud all in one. We have a lot of work to do people, it will take more than a black president, 8 years, and a fixed economy, but I believe we can do it. We just have to wake up! And stop glorifying the “NEWBO’s” and start lifting up the real role models. It was interesting that CPAC took place the same weekend as the State of the Black Union and how C-Span was showing them interchangeably. Oh the juxtaposition. It was almost overwhelming. Michael Eric Dyson – Rush Limbaugh – Michael Steele & Cornell West.

LOL sounds like a good party to me.

The revolution will not be televised.

JG*