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Tag Archives: life

so apparently this week we’ve been feeling the whole crazy ladies needing to get their shit together and i decided to make today’s blog about where i think the source of some of this nonsense is coming from.

ladies and gentlemen, we all need to work on our SELF-LOVE.

yup... this is what the ladies need to be spouting

yup... this is what the ladies need to be spouting

both men and women are so concerned with doing things for the opposite sex and not themselves that it’s really troubling but today’s focus is naturally, on the women.

JG* was talking about some good stuff in monday’s blog about getting your shit together. but really, we need to get our shit together for ourselves. so many of us are caught in this “i need a man” syndrome and doing everything to get the attention for men and not paying enough attention to ourselves and loving ourselves.

so what’s got ladebelle on her self-love soapbox today? i’m tired of beautiful women not having themselves together and being broke down and driven crazy by some of the simplest shit. this is so frustrating to me. ladies, seriously, love yourself and each other before giving all that love to a dude. men aren’t evil but a loving relationship is all the more healthy and fulfilling when you come into it loving yourself and knowing that you are beautiful.

i mean, how many of us love ourselves? how many of us think that we are truly beautiful without having a man or another outside source confirm the truth? how many of us use men to validate something that we already know to be true? why is it that without this validation the truth of ourselves somehow fades to black?

fellas, how does our “lack luster” love of ourselves affect you in our relationships?

xoxo

“lovin myself” ladebelle

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yes folks, ladebelle’s life was in fact threatened by a now ex. it’s this statement coupled with a conversation with the incredible slim jackson that lead to the writing of this blog and need for your feedback.

summary of slim and i’s conversation:

we were chatting about last weeks “i need a man” syndrome post and i brought up how my ex had told me that he would kill me if i ever cheated on him (and this was one of the reasons that lead to the ultimate demise of our relationship). slim’s response was that that made sense. and naturally i’m like, “oh wise slim, how in hades does that make sense?” slim tells me that men’s reactions to women cheating on them is more extreme then a man cheating on a woman and that women will most likely take the cheating man back. i thought about this and spewed some pro-woman speech and society and blah blah blah… something like this:

i think that society grooms women to be docile creatures and accepting of men’s trifling ass behavior. women are taught to be happy with just having a man period–even if that means settling for a sub-par man. and this is bullshit

hence the birth of this specific blog.

the cheaters…

i think that it’s a known fact that both men and women cheat. men suck at it and women are more calculated. but why do they cheat?

research shows that these are the top 6 reasons for why men cheat:

  1. she ain’t what she used to be
  2. she nags too much
  3. the thrill of doing something they aren’t supposed to be doing
  4. they just want to because they think they’re missing something or they settled down too early
  5. it’s “biology” (i’d like to represent that i think this right here is bullshit)
  6. it’s just sex

ok… so now for women’s top 6 reasons:

  1. familiarity breeds indifference or we just don’t feel appreciated
  2. you’re leading parallel lives and spending less time together
  3. the passion has fizzled
  4. the fantasy has fizzled
  5. your ego needs a boost
  6. it’s payback for his cheating

i think that cheating is a result of something missing in the relationship period.

what do you do?

so now someone has cheated. what are the responses?

men, do you go crazy and kill her? do you choke her out ike-style? or do you like mario winans (i think that’s who the song is by) and you want your woman to keep it on the low?

women, do you get lorena-bobbit on that ass or are you more like hillary clinton? are you publicly supporting him for cheating with a crazy transvestite while silently plotting against him? or do you simply pack your shit and go?

let’s talk about it!

xoxo

ladebelle (aka i’m happy i’m still alive)

p.s.

at this time i would like to point out that there are more songs by women going crazy over a male cheating on them then there are songs by men going crazy.

so i’m sitting here watching music videos and i was watching the S.E.X. video with lyfe and it inspired me to write this blog. before i continue with the blog, i HAVE to address one of these lines… ok, so how many women have heard the line, “if you really love me then you would give it up”? maybe it’s been so long since i’ve heard that shit that it seems ludacris to me! do people really say that shit? wait… something just registered to me.. lol… i’m an adult and we don’t say that shit…

ok, so now back to the regularly scheduled blogging…

i wish someone woulda saved me!

i wish someone woulda saved me!

so listening to this song inspired me to think back to when i lost my virginity… it was the summer before i started highschool. (yes,i was kinda young) i was working as a lifeguard and swim instructor at the center. everyone had started spreading rumors earlier that summer that i’d had sex with this person and that person but i was still a virgin. i didn’t understand why everyone was so infatuated with sex at this point in time cuz i’d yet to have it. i’d done the kissing and that same summer i’d gotten my first hicky. it was huge and blue and it was on my chest, literally. not my breasts, my chest… it was extremely hard to hide from anyone since i was always in a swimsuit. (this is when i found that footcream and toothpaste aid in the healing of hicky’s) this was the last summer that my family took a vacation together. we went to our normal vacation spot in jamaica.

as soon as we landed, the scent flooded my senses and i knew i was entering ectasy manifested. i had packed next to nothing. at this point, i was pretty damn small and wore the cute booty shorts, little shirts, and bikini’s. the first day we got there, we were out on the beach. it seemed like a daily thing for me to switch up who i was kissing. it never went any further then the kissing. that is until i met raymond young from florida. he was soooo cute! we kissed and then he invited me to his room. i went wearing these super short mini basketball shorts and a white t-shirt. he kicked his little brother out the room. we talked and watched some tv. then we started kissing. he started feeling me up and taking my clothes off. when we were both undressed, he went to his wallet and took out a condom and put it on. it was my first time seeing a dick and it looked funny to me… so he gets on top of me and asks me if i’d ever done this before and shook my head no… then he put it in. all i know is that i’m happy that he knew where it went cuz i didn’t! so it didn’t hurt and i knew that was a problem because i’d heard the stories. it was weird, didn’t feel good or bad, and was just so sloppy! he tried to make me ride him but naturally i had no idea what i was doing. so it somehow ended and i left.

that nite we went to club and i was drinking pretty heavily… he took me outside to the beach and we did some more kissing and he whispered in my ear, “you know, i still have 2 more condoms.” my initial response wanted to be, “fuck nah! that shit was wack the first time!” but my good sense kicked in and i said, “no, i’m still sore from earlier.” we parted ways that night and vowed to keep in touch. i threw his information away as soon as i got it from him and gave him fake info. needless to say, this first time scarred me and i didn’t have sex again for about a year…

so if u’s readers/commenters wanna reply with your first times, go ahead! have fun with it!

xoxo

ladebelle

simple directions lead me
from where i was to where you are
you say it’s not far from where i am
and you guide me, easily, calmly, confidently

nervous energy runs through my veins
why am i nervous?
we spent countless hours on the phone
letting our souls speak and share with one another

i pinpoint the reasons why
and insecurities flood my brain
what if he thinks i’m fat? ugly? too tall?
or what if he treats me like every other guy

i swallow my insecurites
and digest my uncertainty
i’m now where he is
and there’s no turning back

my eyes are tantalized by the eye candy that greets me
warmth & comfort are emitted by his presence
and he immediately wraps me up in himself
sharing his warmth with me

my discomfort increase
because i’m realizing the true beauty of the man that sits in front of me
his presence is magnetic
and seemingly omnipresent

in the privacy of him
i force myself to not get lost in the labyrinth of his eyes
but find myself desiring to stare deeply into them
i sing to myself, ‘if wanting u is wrong i don’t want to be right…’

his mouth is perfect and i want to try it
taste it, tease it
but as much i want to be entangled in his arms,
lost in his caress, drowned in his desire, i just lay next to him, barely touching

we sleep together, innocently
our souls playing and intertwining
and i sit here now wishing that he were more
then just a thought dancing in my mind…

xoxo

ladebelle

re?ject [v. ri-jekt; n. ree-jekt] Pronunciation Key – Show IPA Pronunciation
–verb (used with object) 1. to refuse to have, take, recognize, etc.: to reject the offer of a better job.
2. to refuse to grant (a request, demand, etc.).
3. to refuse to accept (someone or something); rebuff: The other children rejected him. The publisher rejected the author’s latest novel.
4. to discard as useless or unsatisfactory: The mind rejects painful memories.
5. to cast out or eject; vomit.
6. to cast out or off.
7. Medicine/Medical. (of a human or other animal) to have an immunological reaction against (a transplanted organ or grafted tissue): If tissue types are not matched properly, a patient undergoing a transplant will reject the graft.

–noun 8. something rejected, as an imperfect article.

it’s amazing how a six-letter word can bring about so much pain, doubt, and negative feelings all together. not only can it destroy any kind of positive or happy feelings that you had in general, it transcends every aspect of life.

i’ve never really sat down and thought about all the ways that rejection affects my life… but i feel the need to do it now… introducing…

yes... ladebelle has rejection issues too

yes... ladebelle has rejection issues too

i can’t remember my first encounter with rejection… i’m sure that i was young, as we most were. it seems as you get older, the faster and harder rejection hits.

what am i talking about you ask? ok, when you’re younger, things are just so much easier! so i don’t think that we pay that close attention to rejection when it comes. for instance, when we were younger, school was so much easier then college and post grad. even when you did fail, it wasn’t the end of the world like it is now.
but if i fail now, shiiiiit it’s the end of the world as we know it and i get rejected from my student loans. when we were younger we didn’t have to have jobs so not getting the job we interviewed for doesn’t affect us the way that it does now. and neither does being rejected from the opposite sex.

but now we’re adults living in the sucky, rejecting, real world. it seems like everytime you turn around, there’s another stamp of rejection…

…professional life…
ok… so you watch the dvd on how to master an interview. you do the research on the company. you mapquest the address so that you have turn by turn directions. you are dressed to a tee. you arrive 15 min early. you think the interview goes great! you skip out the office thinkin you just got your job!!! YESS!!! you send off your thank you notes with enthusiasm. three days later you get a letter in the mail saying, ‘thank you for coming into to interview with us. unfortunately, blah blah blah blah blah’ REJECTION!!!!!!!!!!

…personal life…
there are soooo many examples of this… i’ll just name a couple of the more popular…
example #1: you are trying to be nice to someone and you smile or say hi and they look away as if you weren’t speaking to them… REJECTED
example #2: this is more personal and i think that we’ve all been guilty of this. you know that someone is interested in you but you just don’t feel the same way. so you do the silent treatment. you stop calling/texting them. you don’t answer their calls. you don’t answer any unknown number to you.

finally, they get the picture… REJECTION
example #3: this example is very similar to the previous example. so you get to know someone. or so you think. you grow to actually like this person, have feelings for them. and then you realize it and acknowledge the feelings for the person. you just haven’t told them about it yet. somehow it comes out (whether it’s thru them beggin and pleading or with some spirits) and their response is, “oh, i already knew that.” so you think that everything’s fine since they already knew it. nope, think again. for some odd reason, the announcing of feelings warrants example #2 to occur. thus leading, once again, to REJECTION

so here is my question to the world (or just the www) if you already knew how i was feelin, then y bother to force it outta me if ur just gonna REJECT me afterwards??? and y is it that it’s the ugly people that REJECT pretty people???

ok folks… that’s all outta me… leave me a comment and include some of rejection examples… until next time…KEEP IT PIMPIN!!!

xoxo

ladebelle

i do cause trouble but i don’t bother nobody!!! lol… kinda

ok… so here goes my fabulous weekend in review… be prepared for lots of pictures!!!

…friday nite: 4dalove sneaker event…

for those of you who don’t know, i’m a huge sneaker head… well, i kinda love all things clothes, shoes, makeup, and car related… oh, and music… 

so friday nite my bestie terrence threw a sneaker bash that was oodles of fun… except that i will NEVER drink cognac again… nuff said about that… here are some pix from the event:

 

getting ready for the nite's events

getting ready for the nite's events

 

me and sav almost ready to head out

me and sav almost ready to head out

 

 

 

i do!!!

i do!!!

 

this drummer was bananas... he was at the FE concert as well

this drummer was bananas... he was at the FE concert as well

sneaker-freaker-008

kicks...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

hotness

hotness

sneaker-gasm

sneaker-gasm

JG* & ladebelle

your wild authors: JG* & ladebelle

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

art by joe stew

art by joe stew

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

because we party like some rockstars

because we party like some rockstars

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

…saturday nite: foreign exchange concert…

silly me, i lost my camera in the bottom of my bag and was forced to use my iphone camera (without a flash)…

so here are some of the highlights from that night:

we got there nice and early and had front row seats

we got there nice and early and had front row seats

one of the opening acts

one of the opening acts

another opening act with my fav drummer going hard

another opening act with my fav drummer going hard

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

my new girl crush yahzarah

my new girl crush yahzarah

phonte singing to me (sigh)... i was sooo happy when they finally came on...

phonte singing to me (sigh)... i was sooo happy when they finally came on...

phonte and yahz doing what they do best

phonte and yahz doing what they do best

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

so all in all it was an awesome weekend… shout out to mr. smart guy for coming thru the A for the weekend!

 

xoxo

ladebelle

***warning… this post has adult content***

so i figured you folks would be interested in how a conversation between your authors goes… for the record, this is RANTS OF A WILD CHILD so just remember this as you’re reading the randomness of yours truly…

and our conversation went a little something like this:

JG*: yesss!!! I got some ass! LOL 
ladebelle: 
HELL YEAH!!!!
JG*: 
*does the happy dance* 
ladebelle: 
the more important thing is was it GREAT ass
JG*: 
i’m quite pleased
JG*: 
yes it was
JG*: CENSORED

ladebelle: 
excellent… you’ve done well young grasshopper
JG*: CENSORED

ladebelle: CENSORED

JG*: 
yea! 
JG*: CENSORED

JG*: 
lmao
JG*: 
yea* homie put it down
JG*: 
i tell ya
ladebelle: 
man… there’s nothing like some great ass
JG*: CENSORED

ladebelle: 
they are…
JG*: 
had me fooled
ladebelle: 
tsk tsk tsk
JG*: CENSORED

ladebelle: 
it’s been my experience that the big dudes aren’t packing at all and most of the skinny dudes have 3rd legs
ladebelle: my husband
 is of the unordinary hence me marrying him
JG*: 
lmao!
JG*: 
right
JG*: 
i’ve discovered a lot regarding penis size
JG*: 
it’s completely random
ladebelle: 
short men… man
ladebelle: 
short men=tripods
JG*: 
lol amen!
ladebelle: yeah man… 
JG*: 
so how’s today goin?
ladebelle: 
well u kno, at 8:45 am things can’t be too fucked up right?
ladebelle: 
lol
ladebelle: 
i worked out… got to work… and am now farting around trying to look busy
JG*: 
lmao
JG*: 
right
JG*: 
i’m bout to get this ymca membership for the low
ladebelle: 
get that… 
JG*ok.. i think i’m gettin the hang of this twitter thing
ladebelle: 
where is there a ymca?
JG*: 
i’m trying to get twitterberry on my phone
ladebelle: 
excellent… i saw u tweet
JG*: 
luckie street
JG*:
i just discovered how i can see when people reply to m
JG*: 
e*
ladebelle: 
ohhhh… 
ladebelle: 
LOL!
ladebelle: 
(sigh) so special
JG*: 
i know right
ladebelle: 
man… y is it that whenever you work out, you end up more hungry and craving shit u didn’t before?
JG*: 
girl stop
JG*: 
i feel u on that
ladebelle: 
like yesterday i spent all day dreaming about kettle cooked chips
ladebelle: 
how in the hell am i supposed to lose any weight with that shit on my brain?!!?!?
ladebelle: 
ugh
ladebelle: 
and u know, u can really tell i work with a bunch of wf… i love them to death but they have no concept of hot and cold
ladebelle: 
like, it’s in the 30s outside and in the 50s inside our office
ladebelle: 
this shit don’t make NO sense!
JG*: 
lmao!
JG*: 
it’s 50 in here too
JG*: 
i have on a sweater……a hoodie..and a thick ass peacoat
ladebelle: 
and that’s a problem
JG*: 
yes
JG*: 
because i only have on 1 pair of socks
ladebelle: 

JG*: 
lmao
JG*: 
it’s cold enough for 2 pairs
JG*: 
in this bitch
ladebelle: 
i feel u… esp since i have no pairs of socks on
ladebelle: 
but my feet are hot
JG*: 
ummmm ur crazy
JG*: 
lol
ladebelle: 
just a scootch
ladebelle: 
but i’m really cold cuz my hair is still wet
JG*: 
oh no
JG*: 
ur trippin
JG*: 
lol

JG*:don’t be havin me cookin u chicken noodle soup and stuff
ladebelle: 
lol
ladebelle: 
my hair is ALWAYS wet
JG*: 
u r like the internet guru
JG*: 
and i thought i was on my shit
ladebelle: 
that was super random
JG*: 
yes yes it was
JG*: 
and what
JG*: 
lol
ladebelle: 
lol
ladebelle: 
i mean, where did that come from?
JG*: 
the meebo thing
ladebelle: 
ohhhh
ladebelle: 
i didn’t mean to do that but i definitely LOVE meebe
ladebelle: 
*meebo
JG*: 
lol
JG*: 
meeeebo
JG*: 
that’s fun to say
ladebelle: 
… ur special
ladebelle: 
lol
JG*: 
shoot girl shoot
ladebelle: 
www.livestrong.com
ladebelle: 
did u see ur tweet?
JG*: 
lol
JG*: 
wait
JG*: 
which one
ladebelle: 
the one that i said at u
JG*: 
lol
JG*: 
lemme go check it out
ladebelle: 
and quit getting nasty with being nudged… u already got some in reality stop tryna get some virtually!
JG*: 
lmao
JG*: 
i know
JG*: 
this guy just nudged me
JG*but he didn’t know what it meant
JG*: 
lol
ladebelle: 
the silliness of beginner tweeters
JG*: 
i know
JG*: 
we just tweetin all willy nilly
ladebelle: 
lol…so yesterday i was trying to do a video blog but my flip kept dying on me!
JG*: 
LOL 
JG*: 
oooh high tech
JG*: 
i’m over here typin
JG*: 
and u video’in
ladebelle: 
it’s cuz i was feeling lazy and wanted to do something new
JG*: 
lol gotcha
ladebelle: 
however, i will be getting new batteries today
JG*: 
my forehead looks too big
JG*: 
on video
ladebelle: 
lol shut up jen
JG*: 
girl
JG*: 
i have a rhianna
JG*: 
and a tyra
JG*: 
combined
ladebelle: 
rhi rhi make that shit look SUPER hot tho
JG*: 
true
JG*: 
i’m workin on it
JG*: 
lol

please note the following things:

 

  • yes, JG* did in fact begin our conversation with news of her sexual exploits… loves it
  • rhi rhi does have a huge forehead AND works the hell out of it… waaaay better then tyra
  • if you want to follow us on twitter, http://www.twitter.com/ladebelle or http://www.twitter.com/jgeezy14
  • we are the coolest people that you will ever talk to so in case you do wanna chat with us as we make pretend to work, hit us up for our contact info by posting a comment below.
  • although this post does contain some adult language and content, we did have to censor some things… sorry guys…

 

i hope enjoy the randomness that we call conversation!!!

 

btw, this was supposed to be yesterday’s post but we didn’t have the conversation till today (think about it for a sec) and tomorrow’s post will be a video blog of a one madame ladebelle! GET EXCITED!!!!

 

xoxo

ladebelle

i don’t agree with the origins of this holiday, or most for that matter, but thanksgiving is definitely my favorite holiday. why right? i mean, there are no presents, no decorations, or much that superficially differentiates this holiday from the regular old sunday get togethers. nonetheless this is my favorite holiday and here’s why…

thanksgiving offers freedom from seeing your family with the pretense and pressures of gifts. i remember last year for christmas i asked my kid cousin what she wanted and this lil heffa girl said juicy couture this and LV that… she got my mere presence as her present. anywho, it’s this materialism that really subtracts from the holiday.

yup... this is how i gets down

yup... this is how i gets down

i love thanksgiving because it’s really a time for you to share in the spirit of family and love. there is no pressure for gift giving outside of love and nurturing… and that’s really what i love…

almost there!

almost there!

this year, my mom moved to myrtle beach… we packed our car and our friend moks up and drove up here to be with my mom. granted, she’s acting like a slave driver since we’ve been here, but the smells that i woke up to surrounded me with love… the turkey’s scent tantilizing my taste buds and enticing my notrils making it so hard to wait until 3pm to eat. and then fall asleep. and then eat some more…

i love thanksgiving!!!

family makes all the difference

family makes all the difference

i hope that you have a great day and enjoy the spirit of thanksgiving with your loved ones…

xoxo

xoxo

xoxo

ladebelle

so i took the week off from work this week and took today to visit some of the people that i’ve neglected to visit due to the wicked contraints of my blasted 9-5. one of my life mentors is a professor at cau and morehouse so i decided that today would be the perfect day to visit him.

i was running late to his class (smh at myself because it was an 11am class) so i ended up meeting up with him for his noon class. but walking on campus during the day brought back so many memories. amazing how less then 5 years ago i was one of these bright eyed and bushy tailed (figuratively, definitely not literally) students that was anxiously awaiting entering the “real world”. i spent alot of time on all three campus’ and have so many memories.

i tell you this much… it feels good to take a step back in time. it seems i’ve always been in a rush to get through every phase of my life and i never quite had the “ambition” to just enjoy what i was going through. now that i’m older, wiser, and more mature, i wish i had enjoyed this part of my life more…

so i ask you guys this, what are some times that you look back on and wish you had enjoyed a little more instead of rushing?

 

xoxo

ladebelle

***sorry folks… ladebelle is feeling pensive, sleepy, and possibly delirious so this post is a little on the thought provoking side***

5_people1

i think that this was one of the most influential books that i’ve ever read. mitch albom is a literary genius and if you ever get a chance to read any of his books, by all means do it!

to give a brief synopsis of this book, the main character passes away but on his way to his heaven, he meets up with 5 people that were a part of his life at some point in time and they share lessons with him. after meeting all the people, he then settles into his own version of heaven where he also meets others on their way to heaven.

naturally, this prompted me to wonder who it was that i would meet… i think that these are more the people that i would want to meet or just see again…

…grandma rose…

my grandmother passed away when i was 6 years old. during those 6 years, she had such an impact on me. my grandmother was far from the perfect woman but she was the best grandmother that i could ask for. after she past away, i really found it hard to find my place in the world. i always felt that my place was with her and she was gone. i never felt that anyone loved me the way that she did and i loved her through all of her flaws and beauty. she taught me about a nurturing that has stayed with me till now. i cook as a means of nurturing others and that’s how she did us. as hard as my grandmother was, she was equally as soft. for me, she represented balance… that’s something i sure could use now…

…grandpop…

my grandfather passed away when i was 20. the lessons that he taught me in those 20 years are invaluable. i remember the one thing that he used to tell me was that first impressions are the most important thing. he used to say, “ron, you win them over as soon as you meet them. wow them!” and at 25 i’m still trying to. my grandfather had been diagnosed with different types of cancer and had been given 6 months to live multiple times. but he lived despite doctors’ diagnoses. he had such a passion for life. a zest to live to the fullest. sadly, i’ve forgotten this. right now i’m just doing things to keep my head above water, forget trying to enjoy it…

truth be told, i can’t think of 3 other people that i would meet in heaven right now. while i’m thinking on it, who do you think you’ll meet on the way/in your heaven?

xoxo

ladebelle