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Tag Archives: beyonce

 

I’m sitting at my desk… JAMMIN’ to this new Beyonce. Not just a mere head-bob. No. I am full out chair dancing. I even have that fonky (FONKY) face goin. Beyonce’s persona is not so hot. I am not a fan. But Sasha Fierce is on fire!

 

Something like this but totally not.

Something like this but totally not.

First off let me say that I tolerate Beyonce. Ok… But I don’t like her. See I am not one of those crazy fans who has an alter-ego just like her. (JGeezy who?) I don’t have all of her CD’s and DVD’s. (Well I didn’t PAY for them). And I’ve never had The Beyonce Experience. I make fun of all those girls who do all of her dance moves. 
Yes... that is me doing and old school dance.

Yes... that is me doing an old school dance.

I have never worn House of Dereon and I have no plans to don a lace-front. I do not workout everyday to “Green Light” and I do not secretly wish to have my ass implanted with Beyonce clone inserts. I.Do.Not. 
This is the problem. I’m not a complete Beyonce Stan…. so why.. WHY!?! Have I been jamming so hard to this mess. Why dear sweet merciful baby Jesus do I know ALL THE MOVES to Single Ladies? And why can I not control myself from doing it every single time it comes on. No matter where I am. During the Election results party at Opera Get Me Bodied came on. I knew. I knew Single Ladies was next. I practically cleared the floor so that I could set out the video. But what can I say? I did it for my country. 
I’m finding myself go deeper and deeper into depression over the recognition that I just might be a Bey fan. I thought I was more progressive than this. I thought that I was above the Beyoncification of the world today. Women using her to represent what beauty is. (Skinny, although super curvy, light skinned, long flowing hair). But here I am. In Love With My Radio. Talking about how I’m a Diva and how big my Ego is. Even as I type this my skin is getting lighter. 
Shit I think I just grew an ass.
Help.
JG*