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Daily Archives: February 11th, 2009

so in continuation of tuesday’s blog about sexing on the first date, i figured it would be good to have a discussion on what is appropriate for the first date. it seems as if it’s fairly accurate to say that both men and women are against sex on the first date and that works. if you bang on the first date excellent, and if you don’t, excellent.

but what is ok to do on the first date? let’s take it back to grade school and go through the “bases”:

first base

first base is where it all begins

first base is where it all begins

so here’s the scenario… you and ole boy are sitting next to each other laffing together or doing whatever it is you think is fun. there’s a pause where you look into each other’s eyes. he looks at your lips, you look at his. he leans in and you receive him. the kiss happens. and then there’s a little tongue.

all in all, first base you get some tongue. a little licky licky… a little passion… some chemistry popping off.. nice right? is this ok?

second base

yup... rounding second base

yup... rounding second base

so things don’t stop with just the one kiss. you’ve got some backed up sexual energy due to celibacy or some other reason and he’s just that into you. you’ve now straddled him and there’s kissing and some heavy petting. now there’s heavy breathing, wetness in  some areas and growth in others. ladies, this is the point in time where you can *ahem* size him up and see if this is going any where. some clothing comes off, certain “bits” are touched and things are inserted or groped.

do you go this far? and if you reach this point, can you stop yourself from running to home?

third base

i couldn't help myself... lol

i couldn't help myself... lol

you’ve rounded second base and the shirts where left there and as you get to third, mouths replace hands and other objects. some consider this area to be the same as sex. but i don’t think that you can have sex without penetration.

i digress. so how bout this third base? you give each other a taste. is there going back or only going forward to…

homerun

woody? lol

woody? lol

which everyone’s already identified as being a no no…

so what’s ok for the first date or is nothing ok? and if it’s ok to start running bases, where do you stop?

this is my time

xoxo

ladebelle

In light of recent events and the rumors that followed regarding Chris Brown and Rihanna, it got me to thinking. (I’m not going to rant on that issue over here, but I will send you over to The MOGUL Group where I did manage to get all of my anger out) So without discussing the original situation that led to the rumors, I’ll just skip right to it. Word on the street is that Mr. Brown might be a little Blue over his wang being a little green. (I totally don’t believe this, but just go with me)

burning-bush

Everyone worries about getting burned. One of my favorite songs on the 88-Key’s album addresses this appropriately: Burning Bush. It’s a real problem out in the streets and you would think people would be more careful. But with the statistics out there staggering it seems like every other person you pass in the street has something yet when the questions are asked, everyone seems to be squeaky clean. Granted there are plenty of diseases that are quiet and dormant and never give you reason to kick down the nearest clinic door, but that just means you need to be a good steward over your privates and get that check-up regularly.

So what would you do if you looked down and discovered that your most prized posessions are experiencing their own “I Am Legend” transformation?

Well if you are in a relationship, it all depends. If you have been good on your end then I’m sure the first thought to go through your mind is “Oh…. i’mma kill that fool!” (man or woman) If you might have slipped up a time or two it gets a little tricky. It’s almost like the girl who is pregnant and doesn’t know who the father is. Kinda hard to go on Maury and ask “Who gave me this STD?”  This is why I say constant check ups are enomously important. They give you Benchmarks. On May 20th you messed around with Random X. On August 15th you had a check-up and you were clean. You and the boo continued to do you and on October 14th you were burning. In this situation you can reasonably deduce the source of the itch. Getting a check up at least 2-3 months after a suspect affair should give you accurate results. Either way, how do you approach the giver of bad news? Coming at them like a wildwo(man) isn’t  going to save you from the rubber gloves.

So what if you realize that it’s you that’s out there giving people the “forevers”? How do you tell the people you’re involved with and more importantly the one you love? What if it was something you didn’t know you had. Like HPV or something. In that case, your current boyfriend could have given it to you but since he can’t be tested (or affected really) neither of you knew.

If your girl said she had something like HPV how would you respond considering it really doesn’t affect *YOU* but could affect any future women if she doesn’t have staying power. And it may have been YOUR fault. It is definitely one of those sleeper sneaky diseases and not even a condom can save her. They also say that 80% of all women will eventually get this.

Are you more lenient if the “problem” in question can be gone with a simple co-pay, some antibiotics, and a week without liquor? If you met someone who you really liked and they had the burning bush but they were upfront with you and even had solutions as to how to safely have sex with them would you go for it?

These are some serious questions!

JG*