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**sorry for the late post peoples!**

in light of some movies and some real life shit, i’ve been doing some thinking on the state of women in the world today. i was talking to a friend last night about how women are really crazy. (i did move on to how maybe it’s just people in general who are crazy but that’s a different post for a different day) as a woman, i find this horribly disturbing the fact that women go to the lengths of the crazy that they do because of a man. 


i mean, really?

i mean, really?



i think that at the root of all this craziness is the “i need a man” syndrome. ladies, i think most of us have been here before. it looks something like this… you’re single and fly (or not) and you feel as though your relationship status should change. that’s when you hit ALL your friends with the “i need a man” whine whenever you talk to them. you think that you need a man to take you out, snuggle with after hitting that spot the right way, and have those late night chats with till 5am knowing you have to be to work at 8am.

so then some poor blind guy finally falls into your trap and now you have a man. he’s hitting that spot like every single nite taking you out, you guys are making googly eyes at each other, talking late nites and all the love songs are about him. then something happens. he is caught stroking someone else’s kitty breaks up with you or decides things are moving too fast or whatever lame excuse that guys come up with. either way, the dynamics of your relationship have come to an abrupt stop. 

this is when the crazy needy women allow their inner crazy to come out and grace the world with their presence. next thing you know, you’re setting his mattress on fire as he sleeps or “busting windows out his car”. you are now certifiably crazy. and it’s not because he’s a dog or ain’t shit, it’s because you are slap crazy! things started out wrong from jumpstreet because of this incessant “i need a man” sydrome. 

ladies, let’s do something different in 2009. not only have men made it clear that they don’t want a woman who suffers from the “i need a man” syndrome with multiple songs like “independent woman”, “trading places”, “she got her own”, but let’s do it for ourselves. plus, i know as a woman, i can’t be kickin it wit no crazy ladies cuz if she’ll go crazy on him, that means she’s liable to flip out on me too… gotta pass on that…  



ladebelle (aka let’s give up crazy in 09)


  1. “Can I set the bed on fire w/ you in it? ”
    “can I shoot you?”
    “Can I stab you?”

    LOL @ inside jk from yesterday

    but on a more serious note woman please lets get it together
    ninjas are like buses and its not that serious
    yes your hurt
    and you think your world is coming to an end,
    but hurt him? for what? then we will have to sell stuff on ebay for your bail money.
    thats not a good look in 2009
    we are focused, beautiful positive God fearing blessed and highly favored women, no man will make me take me or break me.
    and besides
    i’d rather max your credit card then hurt you. lol

  2. A-Men.

    I have a friend who has this issue and it drives me insane! I call it Waiting to Exhale Syndrome. All these chicks out there holding their breath for Mr. Right, and then chasing Mr. Okay away with their craziness. You just wanna shake them and yell, “Breathe bitch!””

  3. exaaaaactly to both you guys…

    @robin monique… girl please direct her to this blog.

  4. This is a HUGE pet peeve of mine when it comes to my friends. Generally my friends don’t possess this particular brand of Crazy, but I have a few here & there & its annoying as hell. You can’t even go out & have a good time because their sole fixation is on “Can I meet a man here??” (I’m all about the music) Drives me NUTS to see a gaggle of women sitting around with the stank face even when That JAM is on because they’re mad that no meat market transactions are going on.

    Here’s a tip….guys are more likely to be interested if they see you relaxed and having fun. *forehead slap* Desperation gives off a terrible stench. Don’t be stanky.

    I say enjoy life & if a man comes along in the process, then that’s a bonus. But if not then you’re still having a good time. Its a win-win. Everyting happens in due time, no need to force it.

  5. what’s sad is when married women go after other women’s husbands. you have a man, but you want someone else’s.

  6. Lol. She doesn’t reads blogs. She only goes on the internet to stalk her current boo via MySpace. lol.

    I think right-minded women across the Blogosphere need to start the “Breathe B*tch” movement. Because for every blog like this that encourages us to stop living in a penis-centered world, there are 25 others telling us how to get a man, how to keep a man, whose fault it is that we ain’t got a man. It annoys the hell out of me.

  7. I need a Breathe B*tch movement….

  8. @anesidora… i feel like anytime u open your mouth/type you confirm that we were separated at birth… this is so the truth! i hate when women are getting dressed with the thought of “i’m about to find me a man tonite”. y not just look sexy for you?

    @me… i think that that goes both ways as well. married men CONSISTENTLY go after women regardless of the woman’s marital status so this topic i think could be equally yoked. i’ve done research on this topic of “cheating” (which will be a blog next week) and it says that both men and women step out on each other because something’s just not happening at home. i just think that it’s people being selfish

    @robin… preach sis! i think that we need to be more focused on ourselves and treating ourselves better for us, not in hopes that some man will come and scoop you up because u got ur hair and nails done.

    @reign… girl what’s happenin? i feel like fell off the scene!

  9. “this is when the crazy needy women allow their inner crazy to come out and grace the world with their presence.”

    word up!! but you can’t tell them that..

  10. @ ladebelle. Funny post.

    Breathe Bitch should be a national holiday.

    What’s really funny is when crazy rears it’s ugly head and makes public appearances. Like on people’s blogs and stuff.

  11. National Holiday? No, it needs to be a WAY OF LIFE! LMAO. One of your girls starts getting on that Waiting to Exhale ish, just stop her and say, “Breathe B*tch.” Don’t even yell it. Just say it real calm. Lol.

  12. @ ladebelle: I don’t need a man… I like the one that I kinda have… i’m just frustrated with this weeks antics. He thinks I’m dating someone else and I’m not. The last time he acted like this was when I had went on a date with two guys the week before. My thing is that we aren’t in a comitted relationship nor are we officially still dating. I’m free to date and so is he. But we I think about him going out with another chick, then I understand more how he felt when I did. But what now?! Are we to just continue like this remaining faithful to a “relationship” that doesn’t exist? He’s the type of guy that is just all in the head, constently thinking analyzing. So he’s admitted that his mind is battling with his heart cause in his heart he wants to be together but he’s so mentally focused on these business ventures… serial entreprenuer! *WOOO SAAA* yea… like I said I need to breathe!

  13. @reign… yeah girl… take a deep breath… but u know, you really have to evaluate what it is you want in your life and what you’re willing to settle or not settle for and act accordingly. if he’s not trying to take part in it, it might be time to go your separate ways until you’re both able to be on the same page but ambiguous relationships are definitely so 2008 and don’t lead to you being divine in 2009!!! (i will start motivational speaking soon… i promise! lol)

    @JG*… yeah girl… just all sorts of messy which is y i gotta agree with robin that this shit needs to be a way of life shawty!!!

  14. @ ladebelle: I hear ya…. and I would move on if he was just some regular dude. but he’s not. He’s everything I’ve asked for and if he’d only trust what i’m saying then it’s all good. I went on those dates to see what it is that I really want and now I know. It’s not settling with him, he makes me more accountable to myself and want more for me, not for us. I’m not the bf/gf type, I like our “situation” I just need him to trust that i’m not dating. It’ll blow over next week when he comes home. Until then, I’m gonna not think about wanting to go out and check the chocolate scenary! lol

  15. get it in! lol…jk

  16. Now all we gotta do is take this message, wrap it with a catchy beat (a la “Put a Ring on It”), and put a dance with it … then maybe we can start exacting change.

    This is sooooooo true though. For years I have been preaching to my single female friends that its just “not that serious”. You have some females bloggers who talk about nothing but getting a man, how to get a man, or why these soft, weak, etc. men don’t want them … although they should.

    I was just thinking today how not being focused on getting attention from the opposite sex makes life soooooo much better …

    • we really do need to make this a song instead of that dumbass beyonce “if i were a boy” and “single ladies” nonsense…

      the next couple blogs will be focusing on some things related to this so stay tuned

2 Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. […] were chatting about last weeks “i need a man” syndrome post and i brought up how my ex had told me that he would kill me if i ever cheated on him (and this was […]

  2. By Get A Life 101 at Single Black Male on 02 Feb 2009 at 1:01 am

    […] a time when you have women suffering from the “I need a man” syndrome and people preaching to “multi-task that a**” so they don’t get overly consumed […]

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