Skip navigation

mistletoe… i remember as a little girl growing up, i always wondered exactly what it was and why in the hell everyone was kissing under it. now at the ripe old age of… well, that doesn’t matter. either way, i still have no idea what mistletoe is or why we now use it as an excuse to get it on under some parasitic green plant…

so, dear readers, i tapped into my old scholarly ways and did a little research on this because i’m sure that i’m not the only person who has no clue why begin making out out and getting hot and heavy when we see this little green herb suspending from some obscure fixture in the ceiling.

…the history of mistletoe…
so mistletoe grows on bushes or shrubs and it’s quite parasitic in nature. if you eat it, if then you’ll get really sick to your stomach. in fact, mistletoe kills trees… there are little berries on there called juniper berries that birds eat and shit out… ok… so on to the interesting things i guess.

why do we kiss under mistletoe? in ancient times, it was scene as a symbol of friendship and good fortune. so if two random (or not so random) people meet under the mistletoe, then the kiss and if two enemies meet, then they call a truce for whatever their beef is… isn’t that all so sweet?

…mistletoe now…
i remember getting mistletoe painted on my fingernails so that i could walk around to random cute guys and get kissed on behalf of the painted mistletoe on my finger. it’s funny because i don’t think that i’ve ever put up mistletoe OR kissed under it.

i think that someone should use some other parasitic plant that sucks life out of trees to hang up that symbolize lustful pleasure. it’ll have condom’s growing on it (for safety) and as soon as two people are under it, they have to get it on immediately. of course there should be some kind of guidelines for this plant… like if you’re straight, then you should probably make sure that you aren’t under the plant at the same time as someone the same sex as you. of course if your bi, this could make for interesting times. also, if you don’t have voyeuristic tendencies, you may only want to hang it in the bathroom or bedroom so as you’re giving the tour de crib-o you can get it on versus in front of everyone and your momma at the holiday party.

the trees can get it on... can their offspring help me too?

the trees can get it on... can their offspring help me too?

and surely i’m not the only one out there who uses the mistletoe as a way to get a little more action or would want another kind of plant for errr, spontaneous eruptions…

so good readers, will there be mistletoe in your holiday celebrations and would you buy the plant that i speak of?

xoxo (under the mistletoe)



  1. I posted about the mistletoe today too… not as in depth as this though… just wanted to know who people are trying to catch under it… this was great though!

  2. Never kissed on the mistletoe and prolly never will. Maybe kiss under an empty bottle of alcohol. Yeah, that’d be great right about

  3. I had mistletoe hanging over my bedroom door once. Still never kissed directly under it. I think I’m going to buy one of those hats that have the little pole that has the mistletoe on it, so I can walk around and get hot guys to kiss me.

  4. hmm… maybe this is a white people thing…

  5. Yup I’m with Slim on this one ladies…

    @JG I’m sure it won’t take that for you to get a kiss ;-0

    @ladebelle I think we are naturally more reserved. If nothing else we worry about the dirty mouths and germs. Otherwise it seems like a fun idea to me.

  6. I don’t know about mistletoe, but if every thing goes as planned there will be fire works.

  7. I don’t know if I have ever even seen a mistletoe in real life … let alone get a little action under one.

    Hey … but who cares the history … I’m gonna get a mistletoe painted on my stomach and walk up to girls bending over to tie their shoes … and … then …

  8. @ SingleBlackMale that’s the best idea I’ve heard all day and I think I’m going to have to join u on that one………LMAO

  9. I agree with slim. Kissing under an empty bottle of Patron is much more exciting. lol

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: