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Daily Archives: December 11th, 2008

to continue with our most recent “scandalous” rants, i decided to blog on the topic of the “cheater”…

the other night as i was waiting for sleep to kick in, i was reading this blog that this woman wrote about her trials and tribulations and basic experiences that she had. i would like to represent two things here:

  1. i’m not the firmest believer that sex is cheating (a blog for another day… or maybe i’ve already blogged on it… either way, this has to do with my f-ed up history)
  2. the lady in this blog is most definitely a cheater

ok, so now that that stuff is out of the way… i was reading her story and i couldn’t stop until i’d read it from start to finish. she chronicles her affair with gert in such a way that i began to empathize with her. i think that we’ve all been in serious relationships and in the beginning, they are filled with lust, happiness, blindness. blindness? yes. during this infamous honeymoon phase, most are blind to who the person really is and we are infatuated with who we think they are.

but once the honeymoon phase is over and we look at what we really have, some are not quite as satisfied. or we forget to make time for each other. or we forget to make the other feel special. or we just no longer feel like doing the relationship thing anymore but we aren’t adult enough to say that. or we rushed into a lifelong (to be read as: as long as we can’t afford a divorce) comittment and it’s too late. either way, the honeymoon phase is over and now you’re left sitting in a pile of shit. so… what do you do? some (in fact most) do what this lady did and have a fling…

now, let me pause and represent that i think that she took this shit waaaaay too far but i don’t know if given her circumstance, i wouldn’t have done something similar (never to this extent). the way she wrote and poured her heart and soul out and was so open and naiive was amazing to me… i’m not saying amazing in the right way, but i was definitely awed. and some of the feelings that she had, i just couldn’t imagine her being ok with! for example, she was angry when the person she was cheating with was having an affair with someone else. bananas right? the crazier thing is that she loved this man more then her husband. so why stay with him right?

so this prompted some questions on my behalf and i want your full and honest opinions here:

  • what’s your definition of cheating?
  • based on your definition, have you ever cheated? why?
  • again, based on your definition, have you ever been cheated on? were you able to forgive them?
  • why do you think that people cheat?

i can’t wait to “hear” your responses…