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Educated Black Person

Educated Black Person

I have no idea. 

 

I think it started when I was young. My mother told me that being pretty was cute and all, but everyone loves the Smart Girl. What the hell was she talking about? Either way, I was the Straight A, Cheerleader, Dancer, SGA Parliamentarian (lost the President Race), advanced student. (Shout out to all my IB students!) I was smart. 

Great. 

Went to a great college, watched our football team fall from glory (I’m still angry about this. Seriously. This upcoming Saturday will be the peak of my anger), and double majored in Finance & Multinational Business. I did all of this while pledging the best Sorority known to women, sitting on the Executive Cabinet of SGA, pledging the best/worst Business Fraternity, and dedicating myself to my community. So tell me…. tell me WHY do I want to start that mess all over again? 

Again, I think the Good Mr. West can answer this one for me. The economy is tanking, shit is falling apart all around us and it’s getting to be like armageddon around here. WIth that being said, once I lose everything I’ve ever loved, I’ll have something very important to keep me warm at night. My Degrees. I’m currently pursuing my MBA, and I’ve got this shit down to a science. I’m applying to two Top 10 schools and another school that’s pretty prestigious but ranked slightly lower. Knowing this, my application has to be tight. Work experience; check, GPA; check, Letters of Recommendation; check, Essays; check X 12 (I had to write 12 F’in essays), GMAT…….

The GMAT.

This is really what my rant is about today. 

 

I think this says enough

I think this says enough

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I paid $1400 for a GMAT class (Shout out to Manhattan GMAT! I’m sellin’ my books people. Let me know if you want ’em!) spent 9 weeks of my life dedicating myself to the endless torture of scoring a 750 (or better!) and today my friends, today I stand here a broken woman. I take the test next Wednesday (pray for me) and my nerves are fucking gone. Everything is about the GMAT to me. A friend asked me a random question and in my mind I listed the options A, B, C, D, E, and began to use Process of Elimination™ to reasonably come up with a response. When typing online, I tend to use GMAT Sentence Correction techniques to proofread my typing. This is taking over my life. 

The GMAT was created by Satan. 

 

He totally created the GMAT

He totally created the GMAT

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The GMAT is designed to mess with your mind. All things that are reasonable and common in the world are thrown out and replaced with a clusterfuck of trickery. And of course! As with all Standardized Tests it is probably the one thing that Business Schools look at the hardest. Sure, they say that’s not the case, oh but it is. I’ve visited all of my school choices and when the GMAT was mentioned, a chill went through the room. The GMAT has become the bane of my existence. It hates me and I hate it. I eat, sleep, drink the GMAT. Even during moments of intimacy and passion, I’m repeating in my head the cube roots of the first 13 numbers. 

I need help. 

If anyone out there has anything they think can help me. Let me know. All of this just to become one of the Elite EBPs. What’s so hot about being an Educated Black Person? I mean it’s not like I have a chance at becoming President one day. (Or do I??? No I don’t. They got too much dirt on me.) And if the Mayans were right then really, I’d only have a year to enjoy my new status as an EBP. However, if they were wrong, I could turn into the next CEO to need a bailout. That would be awesome. 

So I guess it’s not all for naught. Although once I get my ACCEPTANCE letters in March, I’m taking a vacation and wandering the beaches of some exotic island naked for at least a month. I’m not getting this gym membership for nothing! 

 

Good luck to anyone else who is out there grinding for higher education!

 

JG*

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12 Comments

  1. girl… holla at me after you’ve had your MBA and are still broke… ugh… that’s the boat i’m in…

    readers, anyone wanna hire a cute, smart, witty, degreed lady?

  2. Girl stop. I chose these schools especially for their employment opportunities post graduation and beyond. They have reps to protect so they will work to make sure their graduates are successful. Plus, I am NOT paying 100k to not have a kick ass job afterwards.

  3. I agree wholeheartedly. I’m in the process of saving to take a LSAT class, then I gotta take another class over the summer for the GMAT. This JD/MBA idea aint looking great right now.

  4. I feel your plight … so seriously. I was going to apply this year … and had to push it back because I knew my application wasn’t going to be where I needed it to be. My GMAT book scares me … it really scares me.

    @Ladabelle: I’d hire ya … willing to work for peanuts?

  5. @jg… girl… good luck… that’s all i can say… but don’t forget the little people when you rise! i really just hope i’m not still a nobody then…lol!

    @peyso… you’re ambitious… GET THAT!!!

    @SBM… thnx… i think? lol… i’m worth WAAAY more then peanuts buddy

  6. *shudder* I haven’t taken the GMAT, but this sounds just like my bar exam experience (and to a lesser extent, LSAT….I kinda slacked on that). I was SO fried by the time the last Tuesday in July 2004 came around…. I tell bar takers to take time for themselves here and there. Taking that evening off studying may make you WAY more productive the next day than using it to do more half-assed burnt out studying that leaves you worse for wear the next day.

    Anyway, best of luck to you. I think I’m good on degrees (for now). *snuggles up warmly*

  7. @anesidora… ohhhh, so ur the one i need to call when i get into trouble huh? lemme get ur number!

  8. @Peyso: Check to make sure you have to take both exams for the JD/MBA. I know at the schools I’m applying to the GMAT is sufficient for the JD/MBA. I’m also applying to a joint program (MBA/M. Public Policy) at one of my schools, and I don’t have to take the GRE, just the GMAT.

    @ladebelle: I would never forget family. Plus, you’ll be up there too. Me and your hubby were saying we all need to start a “Black Love is Back” movement and get rich off that.

    @ SBM: Just take the class. I promise. It’s organized, and take a lot of the stress of self-study away.

    @Anesidora: I agree. This past week I didn’t do a darn bit of GMAT. I took a practice test today and did much better on previous tests. Great feeling. After my MBA I’m going for my PhD a little later on. So I can be a professor with a bangin ass schedule, writing books.

  9. @ladebelle I can only help you if you need an LLC formed or a contract drafted. Outside of that, I’m pretty useless.

  10. @ Anesidora…..we should talk! I do need an LLC formed. Well actually a non-profit.

  11. Just the thought of preparing for grad school makes me shudder, sigh, and collapse. It’s all so very frightening, but I keep telling myself “Next year is the year to go back to school!”. This actually is the best time to go back to school, anyway, with the economy going to hell. By the time you graduate, things should be back on track…hopefully.

    Good luck on everything.

  12. Thanks!! Get out there and do it girl. This economic situation is a mess.


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